General Fatass
by CelcoLevi
Summary: When a boy 10-year old boy named Rick docker drinks too much crak-bubble beer, he repeats an event in the year 2115. Meanwhile, Cartman is haunted by the memories of this event back in the year 2014
1. Chapter 1 The way there

30th July 2115 12:50

TJ's house, the marsh family is going to the big re-enactment

Billy: TJ are you even dressed yet?

TJ: Hang on dad; I'll be out in a second

TJ comes out, wearing a reddish tuxedo

Billy: nice

Car honks, they walk out the house and lock the door. They get into the car

Billy: TJ, did you know that your great-great grandfather was in that war?

TJ: Wow really?

Billy: yup, a lot of other people's ancestors were in that war, it was led by General Plymkin

TJ: Wow, I can't wait to see that re-enactment!


	2. Chapter 2 Crak-bubble beer

TJ notices his friends are there as well, he goes by them

TJ: Hey guys

Carl: sup TJ

TJ: so, I heard they're going to show the man old enough to remember what happened in the war

Kyle: (that's my grandpa!)

TJ: Really?

Kyle: (yeah)

Carl: He claims he was dead at the time, and was in hell.

TJ: wow, what did he do wrong?

Kyle: (He didn't go to church)

Carl: why didn't go to church?

Kyle: (to see the movie that started the war)

Docker: You know, I bet the Americans are going to win this one

Carl: what? No! The Americans don't win it!

Docker: You're going against your country if you don't believe the Americans are going to win!

TJ face palms

TJ: fatass, neither the Canadians nor the Americans will win the war

Docker: How are you so sure?

The boys pause, Carl's eyes widen

Carl: …because it's a fucking re-enactment! We were informed that Satan would pop out of the ground and would cause a shitstorm to happen after Terrance & Philip get shot!

Docker: who's Terrance & Philip?

Carl: the original people who founded the show which we now know as "Treggle & Phuck"

Docker: okay… I bet if the Americans win, you have to be my personal slaves for a month, but if you win, I have to be your personal slave for the month!

Carl: Ok, fine!

Docker: Fine!

They walk away from each other

TJ: Stupid asshole!

Carl: Yeah, I know!

Kyle: (you guys! Look!)

Trumpets sound, out comes a very old and disabled, Kenny McCormick

Kenny mumbles into the microphone, and then he proceeds to speak clearly

Kenny: Today is the day when our ancestors, went to war with the Canadians. It was led by General Plymkin and started by M.A.C; founded of course, by Sheila Broflovski

American and Canadian soldiers were getting ready to battle

Kenny: the black soldiers were strapped to tanks and planes for uh… protection, even if it was racist.

Kenny pulls out a pistol and shoots it

The two sides began to charge. Eventually, the Americans begin to take over the war, Kenny stops them

Kenny: No! No! No! Stop! Stop!

They stop

Kenny what was that? Neither the Canadians nor the Americans won!

Thunder suddenly starts

Kenny: damnit! This happens everywhere I go! Rain rain rain all the way!

Carl: wow Kyle, your grandpa still isn't dead yet?

Kyle: (Dude!)

TJ: Carl, that's not cool

The people enter the inside of the south park banquet hall

TJ: where the hell is Docker?

Kyle comes up with a bottle

Kyle: (hey guys check it out!)

Carl: what is that?

Kyle: (what's it to you?)

TJ: Alcohol?

Kyle: (crak-bubble beer)

Carl: Crak-bubble beer? Dude I heard that stuff is _really _strong

Docker arrives dressed in green with squinting eyes

Docker: Afternoon, men!

TJ: Docker… what the hell are you doing?

Carl: Yeah! You're dressed up like the American soldiers!

Docker: I've decided that I'm going to lead these troops. Screw you guys, home

TJ: You can't just come up to the American-Canadian war re-enactment dressed up like General Plymkin, fatass!

Docker: Really? I'm pretty sure I just did!

TJ: they're _not_ gonna let you be in the re-enactment dickhead!

Docker spots the bottle

Docker: what's in that bottle?

Carl: it's a bottle of Crak-bubbles beer

Docker takes the bottle from Kyle's hand

Docker: I'll take that!

Docker opens the bottle and drinks it empty, then leaves. The boys are shocked

TJ: I think Docker has been drinking

Later on, the weather clears away and Kenny rewrites his narration script. The re-enactment starts

The men in green are the Americans; the Canadian men in grey are the Canadians

Kenny: ahem… it was a cold morning in 2012. Sheila Broflovski was leading M.A.C against Canada to execute the beloved Terrance & Philip and kill the source of "obscenities" which she believed had been Canada. It ensured a bloody horrific battle, but after many hours of war, Sheila had shot Terrance & Philip herself, even though her son Kyle Broflovski had taught her the wrong doings and the fact that her adopted son "Sir Ike Broflovski" was Canadian himself…

Docker: Yawn!

Carl: Docker! Dude! Your ancestor had a V-Chip!

Docker: Bullcrap!

Kenny: I shall never forget the day that that fatass Eric Cartman bet me 100 bucks to light a fart on fire, which resulted in my death… after Sheila had shot Terrance & Philip, Satan exploded out of the ground due to the innocent blood touching American soil, along with his former gay lover, Saddam Hussein. Here is the re-enactment of that great battle.

Kenny blew the whistle, the two sides charge

American Leader: Charge!

Canadian Leader: Let's bring those American stranges down!

American Leader: Fire!

Some guns go off

American re-enactors: yeah!

Canadian: let's go my lads!

Their guns fire off

The battle continues, and even a cow gets into the act

Docker gets in to the battle; he begins hitting people with an unloaded gun

Spectator 1: so this is what is was like?

The battle continues, but now it's hand to hand combat

Spectator 2: [stands up] hey, what the hell is that guy doing?

Docker runs out of the crowd, firing his assault gun into the tower

Docker: woo hoo! Go go Americah!

Re-enactors: huh? Wha-?

Kenny: oh god dammit, what now?

Re-enactor: He killed the Canadian minister

Re-enactor 2: He can't do that!

Kenny: The Americans don't kill the fucking minister!

Docker: Our children shall be safe!

TJ: Docker! You can't do that!

Kenny: damnit, now we have to start over… again!


	3. Chapter 3 The drunken rise

Blen Docker {Rick Docker's father}: Okay people! Settle down! We're going to do the _entire _re-enactment again, because of some confusion over the bell. Now Rick, I know you're just trying to help, but we have to keep equal until a specific someone shoots someone in order for Satan to appear

Docker: But why? Why should we keep the bell and wait for some patsy ass children to appear and tell us what we're doing wrong?

Blen: Well, that's what happened isn't it?

Docker: But we don't _have _to wait for children to come up and defend their heroes who corrupt them in the first place!

Blen: I beg your pardon?

Docker: my men, we don't have to be told by an old man what to do and what not to do in the battle field! Sure, we could cancel, and go home to our wives and say, "fuck you bitch! I cancelled like I was supposed to, didn't I? Aren't you happy?!" Or, or we stay independent. Stay independent, and when we subdue these horrific flappy headed button eyed Canadians, we hold our guns up high, and yell "Not this year! This year belongs to America! Go America! Go Broncos!" [Some of the men drink Crak-Bubble Beer]

Blen takes a swig

Blen: My god, he's right!

Mr Black: Blen!

Blen: I've been re-enacting this war for over 2 years now. [throws down his hat] And for 3 years we Americans have let some punchy youngsters stop us by the command of an old man who claims he was dead during the war! Well, I'm sick of it!

Mr Black: Yeah! Why do we have to be their black assholes every year?!

Billy: I'm just tired of losing this war!

Blen: and I say it's time to kick fucking ass! Who's with me?!

Re-enactors: Yeah!

Re-enactor: Yeeeeaaaaaah! [Drops down drunk]

Docker grins like he has a raging clue


	4. Chapter 4 The drunken win

At the battlefield, again…

Kenny: S-sorry folks, for the false start. We're ready to begin for the last time. It was a cold morning in 2012. Sheila Broflovski was-

Kenny doesn't get to finish his speech when a gun shoots; he turns to look at the person who shot the gun and the whole army comes charging down the field

American 1: Yaaah! Woooo!

American 2: Come on! Just give up! We're not gonna let you corrupt our children any longer!

Seb Broflavski: [points hand] Dafuq are they doing?

Risgy Stotch: [drunk] you flappy headed sons'a'bitches!

An American shoots another Canadian in the belly

Canadian: Eh! That hurt!

Kenny: dammit! What the fuck are they doing?!

Carl: uh oh…

TJ: This didn't happen! My great grandpa told _me_ all that before he died!

Carl: what?

TJ: run for your life dude!

Docker: Go! Go my men! Free us from the obscenitah, Canada! Blame Canada!

Canadian soldier: Obscenitah?

Re-enactor: Come on!

Seb gets tackled by Blen

Seb: Eh?

Blen pins him to the ground and aims his gun at him

Blen: Surrender your men, general!

Seb: Blen, Have you lost your god damn mind?!

Blen hits him with the gun and loads the gun

Blen: I said SURRENDER YOUR MEN, GENERAL!

Seb: okay, wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait! You don't have to kill me! I surrender! We surrender!

The Canadian soldiers drop their guns and raise their arms. TJ and Carl and Kyle walk out from behind a tree with their hands up

Officer Maxc: wait… the south wins?

Blen: the south wins!

Re-enactors: Yeaah!

Kenny has his hand on his face

Kenny: oh god damnit.


	5. Chapter 5 Blame Canada? Blame Canada!

Back at the south park banquet hall

Blen walks up to Seb

Blen: well, we can all be friends now, come on Seb, have some of this crak-bubble beer

Seb: why be happy? I can't be happy! You ruined the re-enactment!

Blen: come on Seb, live a little

Seb sips the bottle, and then proceeds to drink the whole of it. Docker walks up to TJ and Carl

Docker: so… you guys ready to be my slaves yet?

Carl: You cheated Docker!

TJ: Yeah! But it doesn't matter, because the bet was that neither of the Americans or Canadians won the war! And the Americans _still _didn't win the war, dipshit!

Carl: Yeah! Study a little next time! Everyone can remember that war!

Docker: [sigh] Fuck you guys, seriously. So so so hard! And this is not over. Not by a long shot!

The men get more drunk

Seb: {drunk} all I want to say is, us Canadians would a finished you if it wasn't for the medalling Satan!

Billy: That's not true! We Americans would have kicked your fucking square asses anyway!

Bartender: Yeah!

Re-enactor: Yeah!

Canadian re-enactor: Well you're dreaming, buddy!

Billy: I'm not your buddy, guy!

Seb: He's not your guy, friend!

Billy: I'm not your friend buddy!

Seb: I'm not your buddy, pal!

Billy: I'm not your pal, bro!

Seb: well I'm not your bro, dude!

Billy: I'm not your dude, friend!

Docker whispers to his father

Docker: perchance we blame Canada?

Blen: Huh?

Docker: they mock our accent and American looks, soldier! They find toilet humour funny! Our kids are watching those creeps and will light themselves on fire and burn in hell!

Blen: They are?

Docker: yeah! They don't respect our authoriteh! I even have a little song to sing about it!

Docker drinks another bottle of Crak-bubble beer and smashes it to the floor, he then walks up to a podium and starts singing. His eyes appear much squinted

Docker: _Times have changed, our kids are getting worse! They won't obey their parents they just want to fart and curse!_

Billy: _Should we blame the government?_

Seb: _or should we blame society?_

Cable McCormick, Blen Docker and Garret Broflovski: _Or should we blame the images on TV?_

Docker: _NEHOOO! Blame Canada!_

Everyone: _Blame Canada?_

Docker: _Yeah! With all their beady little eyes and their flapping heads so full of lies!_

Everyone: _Blame Canada! Blame Canada!_

Docker: _We need to form a full assault!_

Everyone: _It's Canada's fault!_

Docker: _Yeah!_ _Blame Canada! [starts marching down the street]_

Everyone: _Blame Canada!_

Docker: _It seems that everything's gone wrong, Since Canada came along! Everyone!_

Everyone: _Blame Canada! Blame Canada!_

Re-enactor: _They're not even a real country anyway!_

Female Re-enactor: _My son could have been a doctor or a lawyer it's a true, Instead he burned up like a piggy on the barbecue!_

Everyone: _Should we blame the matches? Should we blame the fire? Or should we blame the doctors who allowed him to expire?_

Docker: _Hell no!_

Everyone: _Blame Canada! Blame Canada!_

Docker: _with all their hockey hullabaloo,_

Female Re-enactor 2: _And that bitch Anne Murray too!_

Everyone: _Blame Canada! Shame on Canada! For… the smut we stop, the trash we must bash, the laughter and fun, Must be all undone, we must blame them and cause a fuss, before somebody thinks of blaming us!_

Docker: [to himself] sweet!


	6. Chapter 6 The biography

Meanwhile in 2014, South Park Elementary School

Mr Garrison: Principle Victoria, it is wrong! It is wrong and I will _not _teach the Canadian-American war to my students!

Principle Victoria: well why not?

Mr Garrison: Because it's bringing back horrible memories that's why!

Principle Victoria: well I can assure you; the children can handle this type of event and do the biography for the life of it

Mr Garrison: have you forgotten? Last time someone brought it up; Eric Cartman went into a shallow state of mental psychosis!

Mr Mackey: Mr Garrison, how old was he when you talked about it to him?

Mr Garrison: …nine

Principle Victoria: that was in the same year the war had happened

Mr Garrison: Fine! But what the hell are all the children who came to south park _after_ the war gonna do?

Principle Victoria: they'll study it off their buddies and look it up

Mr Garrison: Okay then! But if Eric runs home, I'm not going to chase after him again!

Mr Garrison leaves to fourth grade

Mr Garrison: okay children, listen up!

The class quietens

Mr Garrison: now, I've been assigned to have the children who lived in South Park 2 years ago to write biography on a war, and the children who lived in South Park less than 2 years ago to study and ask their buddies what it was like

Kyle puts his hand up

Mr Garrison: yes Kyle?

Kyle: what war?

Mr Garrison: the one started by mac known as the "Canadian-American war"

Cartman: Canadian-American war?

Cartman begins having flashbacks of the war, gun shots and explosions can be heard, a rocket cruiser can be seen shooting a rocket, a jet is heard being shot down and when it falls to the ground, an explosion is heard. another flashback of Mr Mackey bleeding out with another man bandaging his arm

Mr Mackey: Wooooooh! It's bad!

Another flashback shows the boys coming across Mr Garrison dying

Mr Garrison: Children... take Mist-Mr. Hat. Please. Get him out of here!

Cartman: NEHOOOOO!

Cartman hops off his desk and begins shivering his desk, he then knocks it over and runs out of class and slams the door

Cartman: FUCK THE CANADIAN-AMERICAN WAR FUCK THE CANADIAN-AMERICAN WAR!

A stunning silence fills the room

Mr Garrison: You see? I knew that would happen!


	7. Chapter 7 Study of the war and wait what

Meanwhile in 2115, the boys are studying the American-Canadian war at Carl's house after the ultimate failure of the re-enactment

Carl: And here it says that instead of being human-shields like commanded, all the black soldiers jumped out of the way of bombs

TJ: Jesus, I never knew General Plymkin could be so racist

Carl: and here it says the plan to move out of harm's way was thought up by Jerome McElroy, before his tragic death in 2013

Kyle: (hey guys, check it out)

Kyle points to another reading spot

Carl: It wasn't until Sheila broflovski shot Terrance & Philip, that Satan suddenly appeared out of the ground with Saddam Hussein

TJ: and the once little mountain town was saved by a little 8 year old boy known as Eric Cartman

The boys look puzzled; they then realize that Eric Cartman was the "Historic Ice Fatass" from last week

TJ: Dude, it never occurred to us that that time kid started living in that old house where the Cartmans used to live?

Carl: …Holy shit! So wait a minute! We met some kid who saved South Park from 2000 years of darkness and froze himself for over 100 years and we never knew he was the kid even though his name was Eric?

Kyle: (Dude, I heard he was good friends with my grandpa Kenny)

TJ: Wow, really?

Kenny suddenly rolls into the house

Kenny: [to himself] Stupid assholes, oh hey Kyle, we have to go!

Kenny starts rolling off, but TJ stops him

TJ: Hey Mr McCormick?

Kenny: yes?

TJ: Is it true you and Eric Cartman were friends as children?

Kenny pauses; after 5 seconds, Kyle bops him on the head

Kenny: Ugh, I hated that Fatass!

Carl: What do you mean? Was he a Jew-hater or something?

Kenny: Oh he was _way_ more than that, He often ripped on me for being poor, he often ripped on Carl's Grandfather for being the Jew he was, He ripped on TJ's Grandfather for being in love with his grandma and he hated just about everyone that was different

Carl: so he was the Archie Bunker of 2015?

Kenny: Yeah, The only thing I liked about him was that he was retarded enough to have the ability to take notice of my recurring deaths along with Timmy birch. Speaking of which, he became handicapped 2 months later

The boys are confused

TJ: …Wait what?


	8. Chapter 8 what a terrific argument!

Back in 2014…

Cartman has his face on his desk sulking, someone knocks on his door

Kyle: Cartman! {Kyle, Kenny & Jimmy are at his door)

Cartman: Go away

Kyle: Cartman, you have to write a biography with us on the war!

Cartman: …Can't you see that I am emotionally traumatized by the war?

Kyle: Why? You were there when it happened!

Cartman: Exactly!

Kyle: So was I!

Cartman: Kyle, you weren't as traumatized as I was, you weren't the one who got a piece of metal stuffed in to you which zapped you when you said anything bad!

Kenny: (Dude, get the fuck over it!)

Cartman opens his door

Cartman: That's easy for you to say Kenny! You were dead!

The boys are confused at what Cartman said

Kyle: what?

Cartman: Am I the only one who actually remembers Kenny's deaths?

Kenny: [stutters] but… I…

Cartman: remembering how Kenny died started the fucking war! And guess who was in charge of it? Kyle's mom!

Kyle: Shut up!

Cartman: No really, she started a club against Canada because of some stupid movie we watched!

Kyle: stupid?

Cartman: She could've blamed it on herself and she would've been fine!

Kyle: It's not that easy dude

Cartman: She started a war and a song against Canada, which resulted in many deaths!

Kyle: you would do something like that-

Cartman: let me finish! She was going to use a V-Chip on children to stop them from swearing even though it was "falsely" proven by Doctor Vonshnocker or whatever the fuck his name is!

Kyle: How so-

Cartman: Let me finish Kyle! Your mom caused Satan to appear out of the ground if it wasn't for me, which I started to hate the war from then on

Kyle: well, it's not like she was going to kill anybody on purpose

Cartman: …her adopted son, your brother, was Canadian

Kyle: well yeah, I guess that was bad

Cartman: …General Plymkin ordered us to be executed with Terrance & Philip and my mom and your mom were perfectly fine!

Kyle is finally convinced

Kyle: Holy shit, your right!

Kenny: Yeah, my mom and Stan's mom were horrified by that

Jimmy was slightly traumatized by what he heard

Jimmy: …wow, what a terrific argument

All the boys stare at him

Cartman: …Indeed

Kyle: It's a true story

Jimmy: I know about the e-e-e-e-execution thing with children, I just didn't know it was you fellas

Kyle: then Cartman's V-Chip fucked up when he went to turn the generator off

The boys walk downstairs


	9. Chapter 9 I hate you guys

2115…

The boys are studying, the sound of goose-stepping can be heard outside

Carl: …Hey, can you guys hear that?

Carl walks up to the window and sees hundreds of drunken American re-enactors can be seen

Carl: Oh my god!

TJ: What, what is it?

Carl: It's a… it's an army of… soldiers dressed up in 2000s clothing

TJ: What?

TJ and Kyle walk up to the window

Kyle: (What the fuck? Dude! Look who's leading them!)

Docker is leading them

Docker: Who's responsible?

Re-enactors: Canada!

Docker: Who to blame?

Re-enactors: Canada!

Re-enactor: Korea!

The soldiers stop, Docker turns around

Docker: Who said that?!

Re-enactor: MeeeEee!

Docker: Get your ass up here!

The extremely drunken man walks up smiling, Docker bashes him in the balls, the man falls down and Docker begins kick him in the head

Docker: Get up! Get the fuck up!

The man gets up

Docker: Who do we blame?

Man: Canada!

The soldiers start walking again

Docker: Who's responsible?

Re-enactors: Canada!

The boys are traumatized by the acts

Carl: Holy shit dude!

TJ reads the label on an empty CBB bottle

TJ: Holy shit alright! Look how much alcohol's in it!

Carl reads the label and puts his hand over his mouth

Carl: Gaaah!

TJ: Dude, no wonder they're zombies, that's 120 grams of alcohol!

Kyle: (They should be dead!)

Carl: even uncle Seb's marching with them, and he's Canadian

TJ: Dude, this stuff makes people start doing things with occurring memories of things that they don't even know what the hell they're on about!

A bleep is heard from Carl's computer

Carl: …Dude, did I just get mail from the computer?

Carl checks his inbox on his email, an unopened message saying "I hate you guys" is there, Carl proceeds to open it, with a message saying this:

Dear Guys. Words cannot express how much I hate you guys. As we walk our way to Canada, only one thing remains certain: that I hate you guys with every tired muscle in my American body. We will not wait for some Yankee kids to stop us from winning and we will destroy the source of obscenities. Because I will not stop until we have killed them all, and you guys are my slaves. Because I hate you guys. I hate you guys so very very much. Yours truly, General Rick Plymkin

TJ slams his fist on the desk

TJ: God damnit, that drunk piece of shit!

Carl: Dude, what if Docker really does succeed? What if we really do become his slaves?

TJ: Oh god, that would suck!

Carl: we have to stop him from taking Canada!

Kyle: (I can get my grandpa; he'll know what to do!)


	10. Chapter 10 You can predict?

South Park 2014

Cartman is sitting at stark's pond feeling dejected

Cartman: you can't live with it forever!

Cartman looks into the lake; a flashback appears out of the lake showing the events of the American-Canadian war. Out of nowhere, jimmy appears

Jimmy: Eric

Cartman jumps

Cartman: ah! Oh god you scared me!

Jimmy sits next to him

Jimmy: Eric, you were a member of l-aa-laaa-la Resistance, is that correct?

Cartman: Yeah, why?

Jimmy: I thought it was pretty damn cool how you were able to stop the end of the world right?

Cartman: well, yeah… I mean it's not like I can use that piece of metal anymore, not since Kenny wished for everything to go the way it was and then came back 3 days later

Jimmy: Well Eric, I've been thhinking

Cartman: What?

Jimmy: …Maybe you should see a d-d-doctor

Cartman: no, they'll just put a giant balloon up my ass

Jimmy: Well, what I meant was, a therapist

Cartman: …I guess, I usually get these things when something big is about to happen, something that will impact my life

Jimmy takes note of what Cartman says

Jimmy: So wait a minute, you're somehow… able to predict if something really bad is going to happen to you?

Cartman: that's right

Jimmy: you really need to see psychologist!

Cartman agrees, they head to Stan's house where Stan, Butters, Clyde and Leroy Mullens are writing Biographies and Leroy is studying the war

Stan: and that's when chef told me all I have to do is find the clitoris

Leroy sniggers

Leroy: Do you even know what the clitoris is?

Stan: It's this big round pink thing

Leroy: [laughing] Oh my god!

The door gets knocked on, Leroy proceeds to open it, and Cartman, Jimmy, Kyle and Kenny are there

Cartman: Hi, can we speak to Stan please?

Leroy: Stan, it's for you

Stan walks up to them

Stan: oh hey Cartman

Cartman: hey Stan, I need you to come to psychology with me

Stan: …why do you need to bring your friends with you?

Kyle: Cartman claims he's predicting an event that affects him, and we need to be there for his comfort  
Stan: …Fine!

Stan goes with them

South Park Phsychology Center


	11. Chapter 11 You're becoming handicapped!

South Park Psychology centre:

Cartman is in therapy with his friends

Therapist: So what is it that bothers you?

Cartman: The war, the one lead by MAC

Therapist: Ah, the American-Canadian war. I'm guessing there are troubling memories?

Cartman: Very troubling

Kyle: He ran out of class when he heard that we had to write a biography on it

Cartman: Yeah

Therapist: What is the most troubling part of your memory?

Cartman: Something to do with being unable to say things

Therapist: What else are you feeling?

Cartman: Well, I'm feeling unsafe. Like something bad is going to happen to me

Therapist: Like what?

Cartman: Dude, I don't know! All I know is that whatever's troubling me is related to what's going to happen

Therapist: Okay, so something that happened in your memory is going to happen to you?

Cartman: …Yeah, like the crappy V-Chip

Kyle: maybe he has muteness!

Kyle sniggers, Cartman is left with nothing to say

Therapist: What things do you hate in particular?

Cartman thinks for a second

Cartman: Jews

Therapist: [startled] …okay, what is it you hate the most?

Cartman: …Gin er ids

Therapist: What?

Cartman: Ginger kids… and handicaps… except for jimmy, he's Kewl, but the rest of them just don't work with me

Stan: Cartman's already half-ginger

Cartman: Oh Jesus!

Therapist: …Maybe that's it!

Cartman coils in

Cartman: What? Jesus?

Therapist: No, You're becoming physically challenged!

Cartman is shocked

Cartman: How do you know?

Therapist: I'm a bit of a physic when it comes to conditions

Cartman: Oh god! Oh Christ no!


End file.
